quinara: Spike and Buffy approaching 'their' tree in AYW. (Spuffy tree)
I return with the second chunk! Which is to say chapters 6-10. Not quite so much messing around with the timeline in this section - but fear not, such is not gone forever. Thanks for everyone's comments so far!

[start of fic and notes]

'I love you' is a thing you say to people who are dying

by Quinara


Season 7. Buffy/Spike. Some Watchers survived, because sometimes people do.

[free association V]

PART TWO (breakfasts) )

.

[breakfasts II]
quinara: Spike smoking on a crate. (Spike crate)
And this is the last one for today...

[start of fic and notes]

'I love you' is a thing you say to people who are dying

by Quinara


Season 7. Buffy/Spike. Some Watchers survived, because sometimes people do.

[free association IV]

free association V )

.

[PART TWO (breakfasts)]
quinara: Spike dressed up and looking down, trying to be sexy. (Spike thinking)
[start of fic and notes]

'I love you' is a thing you say to people who are dying

by Quinara


Season 7. Buffy/Spike. Some Watchers survived, because sometimes people do.

[free association III]

free association IV )

.

[free association V]
quinara: Buffy's sad-looking profile from Villains. (Buffy profile)
[start of fic and notes]

'I love you' is a thing you say to people who are dying

by Quinara


Season 7. Buffy/Spike. Some Watchers survived, because sometimes people do.

[free association II]

free association III )

.

[free association IV]
quinara: Wishverse Buffy in a white frame. (Buffy Wish white box)
[start of fic and notes]

'I love you' is a thing you say to people who are dying

by Quinara


Season 7. Buffy/Spike. Some Watchers survived, because sometimes people do.

free association II )

.

[free association III]
quinara: Buffy looks up with a bloom of yellow sparklies behind her. (Buffy sparkles)
Hello everyone! I have the S7 fic I've been promising...!! Not all of it today, as it comes in at around 90k words, but the first five chapters. These all work together as Part One of the fic, so are more of a connected whole than a set of individual chapters. There are five parts to the fic in total (this is the longest), and in an early plan I didn't want to separate anything into chapters at all. Obviously, I then realised you can't get 30k words on a single journal entry even if I wanted to, but what I'm posting today should basically fit together. (She says, dearly hoping the last-minute edits will let it all go up today.)

I won't say much more, but this beginning is also a bit of a slow burn, which is why I worry you might find it very dull if you take each chapter as its own thing... But anyway, what's happening: the fic is an AU from The Killer in Me, but only a strong AU by the end of Get It Done. We chop around a bit as things get going, but if you're worried you don't know what's happening, assume it's been like the show until it seems like otherwise. I'm very grateful to [livejournal.com profile] bogwitch for reading it all over and for everyone's encouragement!!! I like the fic and I hope you do to... It's fairly angsty, but hopefully not too harrowing as a romance. There is plenty of sex and violence, but, as you might expect from me, it's mostly chatting! :P

The rest should be posted in the next couple of weeks. ETA 15/08/15 - and look - [livejournal.com profile] bogwitch made me this beautiful banner!!!!!!!!!!!!

'I love you' is a thing you say to people who are dying

by Quinara


Season 7. Buffy/Spike. Some Watchers survived, because sometimes people do.



PART ONE (free association) )

.

[free association II]

.

29 July 2015 22:32
quinara: Wesley looking angsty. (Wes swirly)
People, I'm sorry. I've been shit on toast recently. But I had a very, super busy week last week and this week I have good news, because I believe I have finished a draft of my S7 novel! [livejournal.com profile] bogwitch has to read the second half of it and I have to fix this bit in the middle and then generally make it all shiny, but watch this space. It may even be I don't post it all at once like a fool! Though the chapters are quite long.
quinara: Owl from Meg and Mog looking a bit scared. (Meg and Mog Owl eyes)
People of the internet, oh, this makes me sad.

The Web We Have to Save

An Iranian blogger after six years in prison talks about the internet he remembers and the internet he's found on coming out.

But the Stream, mobile applications, and moving images: They all show a departure from a books-internet toward a television-internet. We seem to have gone from a non-linear mode of communication — nodes and networks and links — toward a linear one, with centralization and hierarchies.

The web was not envisioned as a form of television when it was invented. But, like it or not, it is rapidly resembling TV: linear, passive, programmed and inward-looking.

When I log on to Facebook, my personal television starts. All I need to do is to scroll: New profile pictures by friends, short bits of opinion on current affairs, links to new stories with short captions, advertising, and of course self-playing videos. I occasionally click on like or share button, read peoples’ comments or leave one, or open an article. But I remain inside Facebook, and it continues to broadcast what I might like. This is not the web I knew when I went to jail. This is not the future of the web. This future is television.


The thing is, I can see it even in the way that this post is just an advert for this blog with a link. In 2008 I would never have posted a naked link like the one above, but I almost just did right now. It seems quaint to bother writing the tags to mask to give it a title, even. (ETA: And heck, even did it wrong the first time.) Oh, I am sad. No one writes with punctuation anymore, or capitals. incl. me
quinara: Spike and Buffy approaching 'their' tree in AYW. (Spuffy tree)
People, I am so excited about my WIP it's going to be the death of me. It should be a novel-length S7 thing, because that has to happen, and it was supposed to be some story about group politics and high-minded bollocks like that, but it's basically now a Spuffy romance with the air of plot. And I need to stop obsessing about having sentences as titles, because this is even worse than the meaningless pretentious titles phase I had back in about 2010, but just now I realised that I really want to call it 'I love you' is a thing you say to people who are dying. And, and, I want the summary to be Season 7. Buffy/Spike. Some Watchers survived, because sometimes people do.

Would people read that? I tried to get out of the habit of writing summaries no one could make sense of.

The Page 7 WIP only gets you rubbish, but look, it's Buffy having feelings:

With all rights of editing the rough edges reserved. )

... I am frustrated by the fact that the whole thing does not yet exist, and yet so many words do!
quinara: Wishverse Buffy in a white frame. (Buffy Wish white box)
Because I can't really be arsed to dig into it, but apparently Joss has been chased off Twitter by The Feminists, who it seems were no longer to be bought off by Joss being Joss and writing retrograde claptrap but nonetheless having the women punch people while doing it. And then there's a side narrative about the Marvel execs ruined his creative vision, which may or may not be related. I know many of us are Joss fans but at some point I actually started hating him, so I'm finding myself unbelieeeeeeeeeeeeevably amused!!!!!!!!!! Has the world woken up to his poor little baby auteur games? Have mainstream standards for women's plots actually managed to shift in the last twenty years? Is this the start of the revolution? Or will the fanboys just take this as another reason to act like dicks?

Not even drunk. But this is hilarious. No, I haven't seen the Avengers and don't plan to... Spoil me however!

ETA: This is quite interesting, and I think raises an important point about the sheer volume of messages about Avengers AoU to Joss - it makes you question if whether this was really a hounding that can be compared to that orchestrated against much less major figures. It also seems like the Whedon line on Twitter is that it's part of his job, and when the job is done he generally leaves it alone. Not trying to excuse anybody's behaviour, but I'm starting to see this slightly as another pitched battle between the stans and the haters, with the casus belli (as usual!) a rather ambiguous event...

ETA2: Fab conversation people; I will be back this evening. Just going to add that the man has spoken. From which we learn that people shouldn't blame the critics, for one will always be cursed for one's art and daring to have a political point of view, even if those militant feminists do actually generally bring other feminists down because if Joss says he's a feminist then he will always be helping the cause no matter what. It's backhanded graciousness for everyone!
quinara: Spike and Buffy approaching 'their' tree in AYW. (Spuffy tree)
What is this, I hear you ask? I cannot possibly have written fic again! Oh, but I have. As many of you have already gathered, I managed to pull my finger out earlier in the week and post a new fic to [livejournal.com profile] seasonal_spuffy. If you are familiar with stuff of mine, it's possible the general thrust of characterisation and themes are a little tired, but hopefully there's quite a lot to entertain as well!! It makes me think that I really want to get this other project that's been on the bubble for god know's how long finished so I can properly commit to thinking about other writing projects and coming up with something new about something. Also, because I seem to be missing the bus on the comics' investment in Spuffy, though my issues there are another story.

Anyway! This is the fic - on LJ and AO3.

By the click of someone else's slippers

S6 | NC-17(ish) | ~34,000 words total in seven chapters


Spike has spent the last few months in an AU LA with no memory of Buffy or even Sunnydale. Buffy comes to rescue him, but Spike’s not sure why she bothers. At the end of the day, though, it’s really just a rewrite of Smashed

On LJ @ Seasonal Spuffy! | At the AO3!

.
quinara: Mog from Meg and Mog swimming in a diving suit. (Meg and Mog Mog underwater)
So, I am working on my [livejournal.com profile] seasonal_spuffy fic. On the one hand, excepting half of one relatively short scene, the draft is complete and pushing 27,000 words. On the other hand, I literally figured out what the story is "about" as I was writing the very final paragraph. Which means the task now lies ahead of me of nipping and tucking an otherwise relatively entertaining but generally straightforward plot into thematic significance, argh. Too many times this has happened to me, but it is a lesson in just writing for the sake of writing, because eventually I always do figure out the point of a story, whether it's at the wire or not, and I think those ones are sometimes more effective than the fics where I know what I'm on about as I go along. Or maybe not. Will see.

I also have to go into work this afternoon so that I can at least pretend everything is ready for me to abandon an incredibly busy start of term for four days and swan off to Denmark for a conference. The timing, it is not good, but I've never been to Denmark, it's a chance to meet up with some people and present on something new; and most things work over email anyway... Tralala. ... :/

ETA: ARGH; I lied. This fic is not sodding finished. There will have to be more. It will have to be written next weekend. Well, never mind.
quinara: Spike drinking from a blood bag. (Spike blood bag)
So, the last couple of weeks have been slightly underblogged... It was my birthday yesterday (thank you all for the good wishes!!!), which involved a return to the parents' homestead and a nice lunch, including pudding wine, the leftovers of which is calling my name from the fridge. It was however, also an hour too short, glad as I am about the clocks going forward (light! Till 7.30 in the evening!! Even on horrible cold and gloomy days like this one!!), and also rainy. But never mind!

I also managed to graduate from my PhD last weekend, finally (after submitting last June), so I am now a Doctor! Updating the world is a pain in the arse, so I mostly haven't bothered, but I did buy a mattress last week, and when the man asked me if I was a Miss or a Mrs I got to say the immortal line of 'Erm, it's actually Dr...'. I was then told that I looked quite young for a doctor, but I don't care. The tyranny of Miss has ended and the great world of joy has begun. I must tell the bank. Not sure when.

The painting of my flat is also complete - and by the end of next week it may even be the case that there is some useful bits of furniture in it. So I am rather happy.

I have committed to Seasonal Spuffy but am not sure about my ability to come up with anything (sing me a new one, they say!). I had one idea, but I don't think it's going anywhere, and then another idea that [livejournal.com profile] bogwitch helped with which is very silly, and I am going to see where I get with that, though I fear I am not writing humorously enough with it at the moment. (Humour! Where did you go???) There's no reason why I can't produce a story and I want to produce a story. I shall have to figure out the Spuffy of it as I go along, like I always did when I just came up with a random premise and went with it. So there. Watch this space.
quinara: Buffy looks up with a bloom of yellow sparklies behind her. (Buffy sparkles)
(I could do proper Latin, but seriously; how wank would that be?)

So, I had grand plans about what I was going to write in this post. As far as I can tell, several people that I like and respect in fandom (both on my flist and off) have been betrayed deeply in recent days. And, for the most part, I thought it was best that I didn't get involved, because I don't know the person whose integrity has been brought into question and surely I could only ever make things worse. But at the same time, how can anyone be neutral in situations like this? Moreover, as I went through iterations of what I might say, the more I realised that the purpose of my post (this post) would always be straightforward. Because, when I think back on all the times I've been betrayed by friends (which, if you look at my friendship choices from the age of five, has happened a lot), I realise that one of the things that made it most difficult was that every time it made me isolated, in my own head or else within the group that were immediately affected. And while online I am something of a jaded has-been, in RL I have been fucked over, crying in public, angry and confused.

And you might all think I'm wrong. You might be reading this, thinking 'fuck off, Quin; my friend didn't betray me'. And honestly I don't mind. The jaded fandomite that I am would say that is a pattern which has been played many times before in the last 10+ years. And I don't like this friend of yours. But that's not really important. The important thing, which I feel I must say in this public post, which the wine urges me on to say (I had a do at work), is please, don't let this define your fandom experience. Or else close it down and cut you off from everywhere else. The rest of us randomers will still be here; you are still with us and part of us and we will keep chatting to you about random stuff. People like me will be crap at it, partly because we've been burnt enough times to keep to ourselves and the people we know well already, but we will be here. This isn't the end, and we are friends/friends-of-friends of you for you.

I mean, I speak for myself here, but I feel like others will agree...?

Anyway, this may be pointless. But this is a post. Because I'm crap at keeping things implicit, and I do really think you've been manipulated. I might also be wrong, and if you believe I am then I want you to know that I think we still have a friendship which is viable.

(And that goes for the lot of you, also, who have no idea what the fuck I'm on about. You are the great internet, wot iz my friends, no matter the differences of opinions that might otherwise split us apart.)

Urgh... This is really dire, isn't it? Still. I'm clicking the button anyway.
quinara: Mog from Meg and Mog swimming in a diving suit. (Meg and Mog Mog underwater)
Please entertain me by choosing a number and a character/pairing so I can find out what my headcanon actually is (I think there's quite a lot tucked away)...

1. sleep head canon
2. sad headcanon
3. happy headcanon
4. angry/violent headcanon
5. Sex headcanon
6. Bedroom/house/living quarters headcanon
7. romantic headcanon
8. family headcanon
9. friendship headcanon
10. quirks/hobbies headcanon
11. likes/dislikes headcanon
12. childhood headcanon
13. old age/aging headcanon
14. cooking/food headcanon
15. appearance headcanon
16. random headcanon
17. any other question of your choosing

(Answers probably in the comments because I'm not that organised!)
quinara: Wishverse Buffy in a white frame. (Buffy Wish white box)
So ages ago I gave up on my Rough Trade New Tracks of the Week subscription, because it was only producing crap and I never had time to go through what came in anyway. However, that does mean that there are some gems hidden on my iPod in the depths.

Because loooook! (/liiiiiiiisten!) Bat for Lashes finally found someone to make her a decent backing track! I knew I recognised that voice; and this is so much better than any of her singles. TOY are shit on their own as well; it's a match made in heaven: where's the album?

quinara: Profile shot of Cassie from Skins, with lots of hair and a hat. (Cassie hat)
Just to say that seeing posts from my French flisties makes me think I should say I'm thinking of you, everyone and us all. I really liked this compilation of cartoons that have been produced around the world in reaction to what happened:

http://www.newstatesman.com/world-affairs/2015/01/cartoons-global-response-attack-charlie-hebdo
quinara: Spike smoking on a crate. (Spike crate)
People, it's serious: inflation has hit the jelly bean world.

I was just buying a bag of Jelly Belly Sours and admiring the new packaging they've put them in, only to realise that they've shaved fifty grams off the 300 and kept them at the same price! Although the worst part is that I first was able to tell because the bag felt light... :/ And that's even though they've cleverly made the bag the same size as the old one, but made most of it opaque apart from a window at the bottom, so you can't immediately see that unlike the old filled-to-bursting cellophane bag, this one's only full part of the way up with a load of air at the top.

Honestly, it should go in the Retail Price Index. If I weren't pathetic I would have said they're now too expensive. (Even though I've lived through price hikes before, and relative to when I used to buy them pick'n'mix with my pocket money they represent a rather lower proportion of my income...) Stupid jelly beans.
quinara: Meg from Meg and Mog presenting her cake: 'ta da!' (Meg and Mog Meg ta da)
So, I've been quite exhausted recently, with the result that today absolutely nothing happened as planned. However, getting back in touch with a random piece of music editing software I was trialling ages ago, I did compose a scherzo/trio, for the symphony I am apparently writing? (Although the string parts are mostly a cheat and would have to be sorted. But the programme does let you do nice things to the sound quality, so it doesn't sound completely like a midified mess.)

ETA: OK, I can't get Box's embed to work, so here's a link instead:

https://app.box.com/s/4amkwdqlfs2n8wtvn2yc

I'm sure many of you like classical music (and amateur attempts at that!)... Enjoy!
quinara: Owl from Meg and Mog driving: 'Who let the owl drive?' (Meg and Mog Owl drive)
So, just in case you don't watch our comm and therefore have not had your flist invaded by teeming hordes of zombie graves (sorry?) the annual [livejournal.com profile] sb_fag_ends Halloween Challenge is on! Come, take part, be Spuffy! It's literally hang-on-to-your-hats Spuffy creativity in the name of prompts and points. Of course, there's a leaderboard and cut-throat competition; but who knows if that drabble you fling off this time might light the spark of your next magnum opus...????

And even if you don't want to/can't play right now - just come and enjoy the surf of random Spuffy glimpses throughout the (Poe-tinged) multiverse!!

Of course, apart from this plug, I also have to apologise, because despite appearances of my endless posting, which will suggest that I am around, I am in fact tied up this weekend (as bloody ever) and like last year will have to be pretty crap in my participation and use online time to keep up with modly duties and support and making sure things are all right on a structural level. But I love you all and you all love each other, yes yes??? Do go and comment!

In general, the rules are on a sticky HERE HERE HERE!!!!

ETA: On a note to bore you all, though I should record it somewhere, my tinnitus has hit new lows since this afternoon that I am currently caught in the sound of someone running the hoover one room away. Amazing depth of field my brain has come up with (this distant whirring is of course overlaid by the usual high pitched shite, but that I can generally ignore). It is quite incensing. I hope I sleep it off.

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quinara: Sheep on a hillside with a smiley face. (Default)
Quinara

August 2015

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